Oops! I didn’t post this yesterday.

But then, yesterday was about saying yes to some things and no to others.

Camino’s cookies are the size of your face.

Yes to half a peanut butter cookie. Yes to an episode of Parks and Recreation. Yes to a nap. And then yes to pulling myself away from that nap to get to the gym for Body Pump and Body Flow.

No to eating the entire peanut butter cookie. No to the scone I wanted to eat all morning even though I’d had a big beautiful breakfast. No the abs track in Body Pump (because, damn, my abs are weak and I wanted to make it through Body Flow, too!). No to feeling bad when I wanted to watch television with my husband instead of writing a blog entry last night.

Balance. Sanity?

Half a peanut butter cookie felt like a little bit of insurance against going crazy … that itchy, unsettled feeling of never having a bite of something that I just want. Or maybe that’s just me. Even if it is, one and done. And I took my bottle of sparkly water with me. And I ate a small salad when I got home.

And I ate a big salad for dinner. And I went to the gym in between. No need for those little indulgences to get in the way of making healthful decisions, too.

Homemade vinaigrette

A little salad before the gym, to be sure I’d make it through two classes. A boiled egg, tomato, greens, hot grains, and homemade balsamic vinaigrette.

Let me give you and the internet something you couldn’t possibly find anywhere else: a how-to for oil and vinegar dressing. Wait for your mind to be boggled.

• 1 part vinegar (I’m a sucker for balsamic)
• 3 parts oil (I like olive)

You are done. And now eating salads is so much easier, right?!

It was a great day to have a camera along the trail at Salem Lake.

In the past, my first instinct upon trying to (again, repeatedly) adopt healthy habits has been to construct a plan, make lists, and set goals (with subsets of goals, laid out in a rough outline).

It’s always felt like a great burst of energy to start things with.

And yet it always fizzles out. Like — oh, I don’t know — maybe I wasted all my energy creating lists instead of actual changes?

I’m making an effort right now to pull back from setting very specific goals, or compiling a set of weekly accomplishments. I’ve had the passing thought that maybe I want to run a 5K, but even that I’m allowing to simply flutter through my brain.

Instead of lists, I’m trying to wake up every morning and ask “what would I feel good doing today?” And then I try to do it.

No more straight paths for me, please

Today ended up being beautiful; sunny and warm. When I got home from work I let the dogs out, laid in the sun for a few minutes, and decided to head to Salem Lake to give me and Saazie a nice long 7-mile walk.

At the two-mile marker on the trail, I started to run. No good reason. A crew team was practicing on the lake, and just as they passed is when I picked up my pace — maybe seeing them working hard had something to do with it. In any case, I hadn’t intended to run, but there I was. “Maybe just a few hundred yards.”

I hadn’t run in months and months, so I wasn’t expecting much.

I spotted a particularly large tree down the way and thought “Just until that tree.” And as I came up to it, the path curves some more, and I thought “just around this curve.” And then “just until that tree there.”

“Just one more turn.”

“That next tree.” “That tree.” “That one.”

“Just one more curve.”

And then I’d run a mile.

If I’d seen the one-mile mark when I started to run, I don’t think I would have made it. Knowing just how far it was and seeing how slowly I was progressing … I’m certain I would have been discouraged.

But not seeing it … instead, setting up tiny little goals … reaching those goals and then immediately setting new ones … that’s what got me to one mile.

Hello, tomorrow

All I know for sure about tomorrow is that I’ll have my juice lunch and a San Pelligrino on my way home from work. The juice is in the fridge; the Pelligrino is already calling my name.

Everything else is what I’ll want it to be. Most likely good things. I’m up for another day full of good things.

I didn’t even have to ask.

This guy.

While I’m still in bed trying to squeeze in a last few moments of restfulness, Patrick has woken up, let the dogs out, fed them, and started our coffee and breakfast.

I’ve never asked him to make me breakfast. He just does it. And he never gives me a hard time about wanting to stay in bed.

On ingraining good habits

I’m improving my life and it’s wonderful, etc., but this is the easy part. My gym schedule, my juice lunches and big-ass salads … there’s a great deal of momentum that’ll keep this going for at least the next couple of weeks.

But if I want these changes to stick, I have to be ready for when I lose momentum. I have to figure out how to convince myself that these good habits are worthwhile even after they lose their shine.

So thank goodness I have this husband. Because that breakfast is just a small example of how to do the right thing like it’s no thing at all.

I took a moment this morning to appreciate it. I jumped out of bed when he called “Breakfast is ready!” Took a photo. Made sure to eat and drink every bit of it. And later in the day, when I’d almost convinced myself that I could skip the gym today because surely it would be enough to go Wednesday, I thought “No no no.”

Eggs and toast and all that.

It has been a really beautiful, productive, energizing first week of my project. My most recent success was staying busy during my days off. I actually gave myself a little pep talk on Friday morning … “You can fill your days up! You’ll enjoy them more if you do! Now go!”

Having spent the past few weekends not doing much of anything in particular and then watching them slip quickly by, I can most definitely say that I prefer to be busy when I’m not working. So. Hurrah to that.

These were some of my favorite moments from the week …

Big-ass salads are here to stay. Saturday night it was greens, spinach, onion, boiled eggs, balsamic vinaigrette, avocado, and hot sautéed asparagus.

Oh my god these dogs are killing me. That little face! Pleading!

I got my shit together for my Sunday work-time lunch and made a greeny juice the night before. It was …

3 celery stalks
3 long leaves of kale
1 lime, peeled
1 apple
A ton of fresh spinach (maybe three cups?)

I decided at the last minute to head to the gym for body pump … on a Friday! Who is this girl? The light that comes into the classroom this time of year is worth the hard work.

Most times when someone asks how I make those pictures on their lattes, I just say “practice, practice, practice.” And that is for real.

I liked this old truck. And also the quick-and-dirty wall solution.

Saazie and I got out to Salem Lake for the first time in months. I think we both loved it. But I’d like to figure out how to make her stop barking at ALL THE DOGS.

Whenever I pull these shoes on, I’m gonna have a good evening. This time, Patrick and I were heading out for dinner at La Botana. We split a salad and an entree (that’s a new thing we’re doing; it works out perfectly).

… Week one, you were a damn fine week.

In my first week of the project, I have had no fewer than three moments that I did something totally unexpected.

Unexpected because these things that I did — I had thought — were the domain of people very different than myself, who I just did not understand. And it’s funny, because they’re each a sort of very simple thing.

1. I drank San Pelligrino sparkling mineral water. Isn’t this what rich people do? Buy sparking mineral water when there is perfectly good tap water? Those silly rich people. (No offense to the people in my life who I happen to know love Pelligrino. It’s not you, it’s me. One hundred percent me.) I’ll admit, one of the perks of my job is getting a drink-of-choice to cap off your shift. A little bonus, and it goes a long way. So I’m getting my green bottle for free. But even just being seen toting around this “rich-people accessory” is a little startling to my working-class sensibilities.

Guess what? It’s really effing good. I would pay for it. I will not turn my nose up at anyone who chooses to lay down cash for this water drink. It’s completely different from tap. Palette cleansing, extra-extra refreshing. The weight of a bottle makes it extra-extra special.

2. I made sure to look pretty for the gym. What am I, a sorority girl? I almost-but-didn’t(-but-I-probably-will-one-day) refreshed my makeup before heading to the gym earlier this week. That, after I’d bought new gym clothes that looked more like casual, nice streetwear than a workout ensemble.

Not only is it pretty, it’s friggin’ pink.

There’ve been plenty of times I’ve left the house feeling less-than-pretty as I head to the gym. On those days I feel like I extra-hard notice the really fit, pretty ladies at the gym; and then I feel a little more glum. What’s the point of carrying around that feeling? I guess I could make myself not care about how I look. But is that really the right answer? Shouldn’t I care?

Yes. I should care about how I feel, but I’m a straight-up liar if I pretend that how I look isn’t important to me.

So if a little makeup here and a cute outfit there will help me feel pretty at the gym, I’m guessing it’ll also help feed the positive energy of being at the gym. Which, when all is said and all is done, is definitely the most important thing to care about.

3. I juiced. I did this thing that athletes and health nuts do.

I really just didn’t get it. Even when Patrick started talking about wanting a juicer so he could have a healthy, nutrifying post-ride drink, I couldn’t understand the benefits of casting off all that fiber; of buying all that produce just to reduce it to a glass’ worth of liquid.

I turned up my nose at my poor husband, even.

But I did get him a juicer for Christmas. Because I do love him and trust that he sometimes understands things before I understand them. (I got an Omega masticating juicer, because it’s what was recommended by one of his favorite health-food books, The Feed Zone Cookbook.)

And then I watched that documentary, Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead. Seeing the health stories of the filmmaker and some other folks featured in the movie helped it click for me. I immediately became interested in seeing what would happen if I incorporated juiced produce into my regular diet.

What those who juice use as dining room centerpieces

Now I’m all “how many different nutrients can we fit in one glass??” and “how many drinks before I get tired of that wonderful spicy ginger flavor?”

Another thing that helped was Joy the Baker’s “On Juicing” write-up, which helped further normalize the idea, but also broke down some of the specific benefits of different ingredients. I’m using it as a starting place for all my juiced lunches.

Seriously, never say never

I was so sure that all these things were someone else’s bag. But that was just me not understanding them, and doing the easiest thing ignorant people do: judging them.

That’s not really my style, so I’m glad I’ve had that fancy water, and got extra-pretty for the gym, and juiced.

And it’s only week one!

Today’s my Saturday, and I knew it was gonna be a good start to my weekend when I got out of bed most definitely not wanting to watch any television during my downtime.

Watching television (or our modified version of it: the programming that’s available for free online) is usually the start of something bad for me. Specifically, it’s the start of a lot of nothing. I can get some minimal things done on days I give into the screen — updating our budget, maybe working on a design project or a bit of crafting here and there. But the work is hardly ever heart-felt. And there’s little opportunity for discovery or innovation in those things (which is the best reason to craft, budget, etc.) when at least half my attention is divided by a show or movie.

Long story short, instead of watching television, I wanted to organize our kitchen.

This is how it looks when I start organizing things:

Explosions. I opened all the cabinet doors, took out all of the things, and stared and shuffled and rearranged until I figured out the best place for everything.

And then things looked more like this:

A pantry with food, and I can see it all!

Carefully arranged coffee and beer and baking tools!

I think part of this sudden urge to reorganize the kitchen has to do with wanting to be more in control of my eating habits. The big salads. Wanting to drink less coffee. And now a new thing: juice lunches.

Not, like, a glass of orange juice. More like a bowl full of fruits and vegetables put through a juicer, coming out the other end looking green or pukey tan.

Patrick’s been into juicing for a while now. He uses it after he comes home from long bike rides. I got into the idea after I watched Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead.

I won’t go into the whole story (you should watch it! Free on Hulu!), but essentially it’s a documentary about a guy who does amazing things for his health by way of a long juice cleanse.

I’m curious about doing a shorter cleanse myself, but to start I just want to incorporate juiced stuff into my normal diet. So liquid lunches it is.

Today:

A small bunch of grapes
One large sweet potato (peeled)
One apple
Half a bunch of chard
A one-inch cut of fresh ginger …

… It was green and creamy and hot from the ginger. It was full of all the good things in those fruits and vegetables without me having to eat all those fruits and vegetables.

I could most definitely get used to this.

It’s nice to have something to sip on when I leave work to start the rest of my day. I’ll miss my tiny cup of coffee, but I think I could get used to Pelligrino.

How sad is this? I think caffeine and me aren’t getting along like we used to.

This is either because I’m getting older and things just change, or because — having worked in a coffee shop for the past year — I’ve increased my coffee intake by, oh, maybe ten times.

OK. To be serious. Three times.

Whereas I drank one 12-ounce cup of drip coffee in the mornings up until a year ago, I now often start my mornings with a double-shot of espresso, warmed up throughout the morning with drip coffee, and then topped off with a small cup in the afternoon.

Every action has a something-or-other

Oh man coffee tastes so good. And it’s always been such a treat. But having added so much of it to my day has seemed to do these things:

Wakefulness on the edge of sleep. Is there a better way to describe that feeling? Tell me if there is. In any case, it’s being wide-eyed at 10 p.m. when I have a 5 a.m. alarm. Have you ever been just about to fall asleep but then your eyes just pop open? Annoying as hell.

Skin crawl. Occasionally I drink enough coffee to make my skin itch. Or maybe it’s my muscles itching. In fact, if there is something between muscles and skin, that’s what’s itching. Or vibrating?

Fuzziness. Most recently, I just feel fuzzy-brained. Full stop.

I won’t blame coffee altogether. Food and exercise, duh. But my instincts say cutting down caffeine will go a long way.

If it’s broke …

This is the part of self-improvement that gets me all excited: I, we, humans are clever enough to find problems and figure out how to fix them; and we actually have it within our power to make the fix.

That’s cool, right?

This is a super tiny problem. Pebble-in-the-shoe type thing. But it’s worth a look.

To get right to the point: it occurred to me only recently that if I disable the snooze on my alarm, I won’t have any choice but to wake abruptly for the day.

It’s just what I want to do. I said so on Day 1. A quick start seems like the right tone to set if I aim to be more productive. And soon enough it won’t be too hard on my poor sleep-loving soul, either.

Some days are about simple lessons.

First, a little of today.

It was like this!

I walked home from work in this beautiful sunshine. I resisted one of my new bad habits — sitting behind my computer as soon as I get back home to “relax.” Instead, I let the dogs out and laid in the grass while they played. I got too hot, even.

The rest of my day was better for it … not too much time lost to computer screens. I visited family. I made dinner. I watched West Wing with my husband.

I could do with more of this sunshine.

More vegetables too, please!

I made myself a salad sometime this weekend. I was really hungry, so I filled a mixing bowl (mixing bowl!) with greens, tomatoes, cucumber, salmon, salt, pepper, lime juice. I sat outside and ate it because I was particularly sunny. It must have been Saturday.

I was hungry and then I was full. Vegetables have a funny way of sating my thirst as well as my hunger. Almost instantly I decided I would eat huge salads for dinner every night until I get sick of them.

Last night: I made a sweet-y beet salad and loved it. Jarred beets, feta, carrots, avocado … lime juice!

And tonight, I split open some more avocados and let them lead: a rough-chopped guacamole thrown over greens, hot black beans, red pepper, carrots, and feta.

Same old same old

I can do food ruts. I’m so good and so happy with food ruts. A big-ass-salad food rut seems like a good way to start reshaping my eating habits.

The possibilities are about as deep as whatever bowl I pick: some kind of greens plus some kind of protein (beans, hummus, fish, chicken) plus fresh vegetables and fruits plus sometimes something hot (beans!).

I’ll try not to bore you all with too many photos of salads.

But really. I might.